George was sitting in his living room one evening, watching television and drinking beer. His seven-year-old son Jimmy walked up to him and said: “You know, Dad, I think I know what I’m gonna be when I grow up.” George answered: “Really? What are you going to be?”

Jimmy replied: “I’m gonna be a superhero! I’ll be seven feet tall with enormous muscles and lots of superpowers! I’ll be able to bend steel beams using just my thumb and index finger! I’ll be able to fly and I’ll be able to become invisible and I’ll be able to shoot lasers through my eyes and all kinds of other cool things like that!” George replied: “That’s nice, son! Go tell your mother. You know how she loves to hear all kinds of fantastic stuff.”

Three years later, George was sitting in his living room one evening, watching television and drinking beer. His ten-year-old son Jimmy walked up to him and said: “You know, Dad, I’ve been thinking about what I could be when I grow up.” George answered: “Really? What do you think you could be?”

Jimmy replied: “I actually think I could be a criminal mastermind. I’d get involved with all kinds of illegal activities like the drug trade and terrorism. I’d rob lots of money and blow lots of things up and kill lots of people. I’d become so powerful that I’d be able to buy off all of the authorities and I’d have a beautiful mansion full of beautiful women.” George replied: “That’s interesting, son! Go tell your mother. She should really get a kick out of what you’re thinking.”

After three more years, George was sitting in his living room one evening, watching television and drinking beer. His thirteen-year-old son Jimmy walked up to him and said: “You know, Dad, I think I know what I want to be when I grow up.” George answered: “Really? What do you want to be?”

Jimmy replied: “I think I want to be just an ordinary man. I want to find a nice young lady and eventually get her to marry me. I want to get a good job. I want to buy a nice house with a nice yard. I want to drive a nice car. I want to have a few kids and do my best to raise them properly and provide for them.” George looked at his son for a few moments with a serious look on his face. At length, he said: “Who put that nonsense in your head, Jimmy? Do you really think you can actually do what you’re saying? Are you out of your mind? In any case, do not tell your mother! God knows how much she’ll lose it if she heard any of these crazy ideas of yours! For God’s sake, Jimmy! What’s wrong with you?”

Three years after that, George was sitting in his living room one evening, watching television and drinking beer. His sixteen-year-old son Jimmy walked up to him and said: “You know, Dad, I think I really know what I should be after all.” George answered: “Really? What do you think you should be?”

Jimmy replied: “I think I should be a transgender celebrity! I’ll get the necessary surgical and hormonal procedures done to transform me from a man to a woman! I’ll change my name from Jimmy to Jessica and I’ll get on all kinds of talk shows and I’ll do all kinds of speaking engagements to share my experience with everyone! And everyone is going to consider me a really special person for it!” George replied: “That’s great, son! Go tell your mother. I’m sure she’ll be positively ecstatic when she learns that she’s succeeded in guiding you in that direction.”

 

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